9:45 AM – The First Message

I take a deep breath, fingers poised over my phone. The first text of the day to my ex-husband. It’s a routine message, something about our son’s soccer practice schedule. I hit send and almost instantly, the anxiety starts its dance. The familiar mind games begin.

10:00 AM – A Reply from the Past

My phone buzzes. It’s him. His reply is straightforward, but my mind twists every word, searching for hidden meanings, old wounds reopening. I push those thoughts away, trying to focus on the now. It’s just co-parenting, I remind myself. Keep it simple, keep it calm.

12:00 PM – Lunchtime Distraction

I text my current husband. He’s running out to grab Chinese food. “Do you want your usual?” he asks. My heart warms a little. It’s a small gesture, but significant. Yet, my mind, the eternal skeptic, whispers: Is he doing this because he loves you, or is it something else?

1:00 PM – The Arrival of Doubt

He brings home my favorite, a gesture meant to make me smile. And I do smile, outwardly. Inside, the twisted games continue. Is this love, or a cover for something darker? I hate that my mind goes there, but trust is a fragile thing, easily shattered and painstakingly rebuilt.

3:00 PM – The Balancing Act

Another message from my ex. More logistics about our son. My current husband texts me a sweet note at the same time. I’m balancing two conversations, two lives, and the twisted mind games that come with them. One part of my mind drags me back to old hurts, the other fights to trust in the love I have now.

6:00 PM – Dinner and Reality

Dinner time. My current husband and I sit down to eat. He talks about his day, asks about mine. It’s normal, it’s nice, and yet the mind games don’t stop. He loves you, I tell myself. This is real. But the shadows of past betrayals make it hard to believe fully.

9:00 PM – Nightfall and Reflection

As the day winds down, I think about the texts, the interactions. The twisted mind games are exhausting, but necessary, it seems. Trust isn’t rebuilt in a day, and love is complex. I remind myself that he loves me. Truly. It’s not a façade. It’s a new chapter, one where I’m learning to trust again.

Midnight – The Promise of Tomorrow

I lay in bed, my phone silent. The mind games quiet down with the promise of sleep. Tomorrow will bring more texts, more interactions, more battles between doubt and trust. But I’m learning, slowly, to let love in, to believe in the good. It’s a twisted path, but it’s mine to walk.

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TThis journey is messy, fraught with the echoes of the past, but every day, I’m choosing to trust in the love I have now. It’s not perfect, but it’s real. And that’s worth fighting for.